Apartment Life

Byrne really wants you to try the Chianti, originally uploaded by miss firecracker.

Dinner with the Pope and the Six Apart crowd at Bucca di Beppo. & The set at Flickr.

Until Tuesday, I'd been using my tiny laundry room (situated just off of the patio) for storage. At just under 600 s/f, this apartment is Lilliputian at best, and despite my best efforts to simplify, I still manage to hang on to way too much stuff, so the laundry room was ideal as a storage space. Cue my sister's move to Florida from Virginia Beach, and I am now the very happy caretaker of an awesome washer and dryer (since her new place already has a washer and dryer, she asked me to keep her set so that they wouldn't just be wasting away in storage - hurrah for me). I am a laundry loving girl. Clean, warm clothes are bliss, so naturally I'm thrilled with my newest acquisition, but now I have a storage problem. Everything from the laundry room is now in my livingroom, albeit neatly packed into storage containers, and well, the livingroom is small.

Clutter makes me very jittery, and I've been trying to noodle this out for the past two nights, but so far I've only moved the pedestal table and chairs back outside, and taken the lid off of a box. I've decided to repack everything and store the boxes temporarily in the walkin closet, then when I have more time, go through each box and throw away as much as possible. I'm giving myself an hour tonight to make some serious headway, and then bed. Tomorrow night has to be the wrapup, because this is sort of driving me nuts, and I'm in St. Pete this weekend (and would not dream of returning to a messy apartment - I  know, it's a flaw).

The rule is that if I haven't used it in six months, it goes.

Simplify, simplify, simplify.

Has it really been a month since my last time here? Poor little neglected Vox weblog. I might start using this space to talk about weight loss. Maybe. Possibly. Soonish. But maybe not, because I don't want to become (more) boring. Also, I find that if I talk about anything too much, it's as if I've been there, done that, and I quit. I'd sort of like to avoid that, you know?

Anyway, for now, I will tell you that I've lost thirty pounds in the past three months, but have been plateaued for the past two weeks (and it's completely my fault...mostly). I've been slipping back into old habits, because old habits are like your favorite pair of jeans; the most comfortable things in your (proverbial) closet.

No more of that, though. This week I've been (almost) back on track, and with all new endeavors, like drinking a gallon of water every day, which makes me very grateful that my desk at work is less than 20 feet from the ladies' room (now; if only my headset were wireless). This is a daunting prospect for a girl who, heretofore, considered three cans of Diet Coke her daily liquid requirement, with a glass of water or two for variety (this hasn't really been true for a few months now - I'm down to less than a can of pop per day).

Two weeks ago, possibly longer, I paid a lot of money to join the gym, and I haven't been back since my initial sign up visit. I'm wasting perfectly good money and some truly awesome treadmills (these have little individual televisions on each machine) because I'm scared and maybe a little lazy. My goal for this week is to start going, and to (quickly) get back into the habit of going regularly like I was in Virginia Beach.

So.  Lots of water, and soon, lots of gymming. I'm also cutting out all sugar, because trust me when I say that I can't have sugar. One spoonful of Nutella becomes an entire jar, which leads to a trip to the grocery for more chocolate, and some ice cream, and perhaps an entire Entenmann's Lemon Coconut cake. I've lived it, and I've tried it in moderation, and it just doesn't work for me. Ever. In my body, sugar is like crack.

I do understand that it's worth all the effort. I like it when my pants fall off (in the privacy of my apartment). Besides, I have a lot to look forward to; my 50 pound goal treat is a haircut, color and a mani at my salon, and the second that I hit the 75 pounds lost mark, I'm laying down cash for some hot Oliver Peoples sunglasses, in that color. I'll get there. I just have to keep telling myself that I want these things more than, say, an entire bucket of original recipe chicken from KFC.

Sometimes it's a struggle to make that decision, but I always come to my senses, eventually. This time, I'm hoping to stay here, sense intact. I won't lie and say it's easy. Anyone who's lost any amount of weight knows that it can be ridiculously hard. If I'm going to be completely honest, I should tell you that it's the hardest thing I've ever done in my life, and that it's taking me a long, long time to learn that food is not love.

Food is not love, and pretending that it is leads to heartbreak. I don't know about the rest of you who are struggling with anything like this, but I am so over that heartbreak.

I am spending this weekend as I spend every weekend, with friends and family in St. Pete. I live sixty miles away from everyone, so during the work week I'm sequestered here, but weekends are for hanging out!

Why, did you want to go with?

People generally call me Mel, a very special few call me Mellie, even fewer call me MelMel (reserved for the children of friends and people who knew me in junior high), and I'm embarassed to say that I was once called Lanie.

My grandmother was the first person to call me Mellie, and today it's mostly used by people who are very close to me. Mel is a pretty given nickname for Melanie, and I was Lanie to several of my friends in highschool.

Oh, and I actually know one (darling) person who calls me 'Mels'.

I'll answer to pretty much anything.

The first thing that comes to mind is credit card and other debt. I'm about $5,000 in debt, all told (not counting student loans), so that would go first.

The second half is a little more tricky. If I had to spend it, I think I'd cheat and buy gift cards to Anthropologie, J. Jill and Anne Taylor for the future, smaller me. I have a feeling that I'm going to need lots of clothes shopping money in the not so distant future! I'd also buy jewelry. Smallish diamond earrings from Tiffany, maybe, and a ring or two. Mmmm, shopping.

Things that I loved about this weekend:

The Etienne Aigner bag that I finally wheedled away from my mother (this is the hundredth bag that I've done this with - we share an impressive collection) when she bought a new one. I switched from the Latico bag that I've been carrying for the past several months, and the features that I coveted when she bought it several weeks ago (compartments and pockets designed and concealed with such sneaky brilliance that it sets my heart aflutter) are now mine.

A Prairie Home Companion. It was a brilliant movie (but I confess that I'm still partial to the radio broadcast; it won my heart when I was a very little girl and even today, I never miss it unless it can't be helped), well written (naturally) and perfectly cast. It was lovely to sit in a dark room with a house full of other NPR listeners.

My Weight Watchers meeting. I've lost 20 pounds (so far).

K.T. Tunstall. When will I tire of this album? Never? Never is good.

My new work schedule, which started Saturday. I'm working 9:30am - 6:00pm on Saturdays, and 10:30 to 7:00pm on Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. For the past few months I've been working four 10 hour days. I am not a happy girl when I'm at work that much, and the extra day off is no benefit to me, as I'd spend the first day of my weekend recovering. Eight hour days (actually, 7.75 where I work) are like a walk in the park.

Napping. I've come to embrace my mother's couch with open arms each Sunday in the early evening (this is entirely new for me). I sort of think that it's so easy to nap at my mother's house because I feel so well protected there, with her (I guess 30 years of love will do that).

The little alligator that I saw in the pond nearest my apartment building this evening. Sure, their larger counterparts are menacing, but this one was just so cute. We have three lakes on the property, and he was swimming around in the smallest of the three, which has a fishing dock. I stopped to watch him for awhile on my way back from picking up the mail.

Grocery shopping. I love grocery shopping.

The tiny, abandoned snail's shell that I found on Sunday and tucked into my handbag. I'm going to keep it with me all the time as a reminder that I'll get where I'm supposed to be, however slowly, as long as I keep going. 

Liberty Mutual is using my favorite Hem song, Halfacre, in its newest commercial, which is sort of about being good, and responsible, and nice. I like the concept. It's such a simple thing, really, this thought that we can extend love and forgiveness and understanding and help to others - family and friends, co-workers and strangers. All you really have to do is smile. Be open. Help someone. There's a lot to be said for being good.

While driving through St. Petersburg on the way to my brother's house a few weeks ago, I saw a bench with a logo that said "just be nice". It's a concept that I've been thinking about over the past few months since I've been meeting so many new people (and dealing with each different personality) while settling into my new position in a new city with the company that I've worked for over the past three years. So anyway, this bench sort of stuck with me, and I did a little research, and discovered the man behind the movement, and his website. Here is another concept that I can get behind. I like this man, and his idea, his "spark". It may be simple, but it's really brilliant advice.

When I look back at everyone I've known, the people I remember fondly (the people I remember at all ) are the loving, kind people, who seemed to shine with a different sort of light. Somehow I know that they will do great things, in big and small ways (Eleanor Helm, for instance, was the sweetest girl that I knew in high school. She was kind, soft spoken, brave and good. And a couple of years ago, she went on to work with the Peace Corps . I don't remember most of the names of the people that I attended high school with, but I will never forget hers). Today I choose my friends based on these qualities. Kindness, humor, integrity, creativity, bravery, the desire to help, the ability to forgive, patience, and the strength to begin again. I think that you have to surround yourself with people who are cultivating the qualities that you wish to see more of in yourself. Kindness has a powerful healing quality, and when you're practicing it (with others, yes, but with yourself also), love abides. Peace abounds.

"I am carrying this scrap of paper
That can crack the darkest sky wide open
Every burden taken from me
Every night my heart unfolding"